The Wardman Wire

A new weekend column - Touching Base - from David Keen.
Following from the Editor’s virtual chocolate this morning, we have some more chocolate this afternoon.

Someone has given us a chocolate advent calendar.

There are 4 problems with this:

1. It will rot my kids teeth, or make me fatter, or both.
2. Daily fights over which of the kids will open it.
3. They’ll now expect a chocolate advent calendar every year
4. Possibly the most serious … chocolate advent calendars destroy society, the soul and the planet.

Ok, its Fairtrade chocolate, so we can destroy the planet with a clear conscience.

But chocolate calendars “take the waiting out of wanting’”, in the words of the old Access debit card campaign. Instead of building expectation through the month with calendars and candles and so on, you get to indulge yourself from day one.

Forget all that anticipation for 24 days, lets start stuffing ourselves now.

Why wait?

I was on the phone to someone the other day, what should have been a 3 minute call, but the guy at the end of the line seemed unable to wait for me to finish my sentences before cutting across me with his own thoughts on what he thought I was saying.

20 minutes later, and slightly more annoyed than when we started, I finally managed to say what I wanted to, and get his response. I probably inflict the same thing on other people. Under the compulsion to have his say, he couldn’t wait, so I had to.

We don’t wait for the nice bits…

• Why wait till you can afford something when with a bit more debt you can have it now?
• Why wait for more sex or less arguments when you could quit the relationship now and go and shack up with someone else?
• Why wait for a patient resolution to an debate when you can win it with brute force?
• Why wait for political funds to come in when you could get them quicker by cutting a few corners?
• Why wait for the weapons inspectors to finish their job in Iraq when you’re itching for a fight?

Even the church is getting in on it:

• Why wait for a consensus when you could just go and set up your own?

Such a cracking philosophy, you can see how well it works economically, relationally, internationally and in every other way.

… but we put off the hard bits?

As for the planet - well, we’ll sort out our carbon emissions in about 20 years, but in the meantime we’ve got to have plasma HDTV, even if it does hoover up 4 times the energy of our old set.

And make the powerless wait in line

The people that have to wait are the poor and the powerless. Here we are all up in arms about one teacher undeservedly in jail in Sudan, and rightly so. I hope the camera crews in Sudan stick around after the story ends to show us some other people for us to get up in arms about.

I’m not looking to put a downer on anyone’s Advent. If you’re down, you’ll just eat more chocolate, so I hope you have a great month.

Wrapping-Up

I just want to wonder aloud: what kind of world, society, neighbourhood, family, would we have if we could wait a little more, and the poor had to wait a little less? Would it be a better one?

Tags: david keen, touching base, advent calendar, chocolate, advent column

[tags]david keen, touching base, advent calendar, chocolate, advent column[/tags]